Church Billboards

• "Big Bang theory? You've got to be kidding." - God
• "C'mon over and bring the kids." - God
• "Do you have any idea where you're going?" - God
• "Don't make me come down there." - God
• "Follow me." - God
• "Have you read my #1 best seller?  There's going to be a test." - God
• "I love you and you and you and you and…" - God
• "Keep using my name in vain, I'll make rush hour longer." - God
• "Let's meet at my house Sunday, before the game." - God
• "Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage." - God
• "My way is the highway." - God
• "Need direction?" - God
• "Tell the kids I love them." - God
• "That "Love They Neighbor" thing... I meant it." - God
• "We need to talk." - God
• "What part of "Thou Shalt Not..." didn't you understand?" - God
• "Will the road you're on get you to my place?" - God
• "You think it's hot here?" - God
• Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em. He'll clean 'em.
• Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
• Come work for the Lord.  The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low.  But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
• Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
• Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
• Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
• God Answers Knee-Mail.
• God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
• God grades on the cross, not the curve.
• God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"
• God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
• He who angers you, controls you!
• If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!
• If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
• Memberships available free to everyone under the Son.
• Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory capacity.
• The Bible is Not Antique, Nor is it Modern, it is Eternal.
• The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
• The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
• Turn Life's Cares into Prayers.
• Want to make God laugh?  Tell him your future plans.
• We don't change the message, the message changes us.
• When you pray, don't give God instructions, just report for duty!